"War is not a tear in the fabric, war is the fabric."

I was in the library today all. Day. Long. I kid you not, 9am to 11pm, my friends. 2000 words and fourteen hours later, I realized I was staring aimlessly at a sheet of paper that said "Penis as a weapon???" and made the decision right then that it was time to go home. (Rape as a weapon of war, kids... get your minds out of the gutter).

My Guinness, what a busy week its been! Essayland has left no room for cyberland lately. Really I just wanted to spare you the details of living in the gym/ library, running on Starbux, and reading till my eyes bleed. Let me tell you- its EXCITING! YEE-HAW!!! Its been a long one for me but and even longer week for J across the pond; after two months of absolute hell he had to take the bar exam. Poor guy. Its bloody awful what they do to law students. I think we're in a race to see who will have a nervous breakdown first. Does anyone know where we can get some xanax?

Last week was interrupted by a "working holiday" at the beach after I bumped into a professor and looked like I hadn't slept in weeks (cause I haven't) and was told, "Erin. Take a day off or I'll have them fail you." So I took his advice, and Ann and I toted our books to the beach for the day. Note to readers: Regardless of whether you're in Ireland and its only 70 degrees, wear sunblock when in a bikini! Three days and two tubes of aloe vera later, I still cannot get my burnt bum into a pair of jeans without screaming expletives.

I also took an evening off last week to see Lee Blessing's "Two Rooms" with the ladies. Performance wise, there were a few moments when I cringed at some Acting 101 violations, however on the whole the actors were great. The play is topical and BRILLIANTLY written- so brilliant that I ordered it from Amazon. It is so incredibly smart and really leaves you asking questions about grief, war, the government, the media, what it means to be an American symbolically and politically... it was fabulous. I highly recommend it.

In other news, I freakin love Melissa Mongi.

And with that, I'm off to bed. Good night, sweet dreams, and God bless aloe.

The Undomestic Goddess: Yet Another Tragedy

When I was in college, until I had my own washer, I would do my laundry at my Grandmom's house. And by do my laundry, I mean show up with two bags of dirty clothes, wash as much as I could and when it because too late my poor Grandmom would say, "Just leave it here and come get it this week." (Yes, that's right, my Grandmom is amazing- AND she fed me). As a semi-adult who does her own laundry in a washer- half-dryer-contraption here in Ireland, I realized just WHY it was always a much better idea for me to stay away from... well, machines.
Since I've been marathon training in this Irish Heat Wave, when I leave the gym I am disgustingly sweaty. After an 8-miler I look like I have been dunked into a pool... okay, maybe dunked into a pool and beaten with one of those noodle-things that I never quite understand the appeal of, but I digress. When I get home my clothes go immediately from the plastic bag they've been in all day to the wash, because nothing that narsty is going into my hamper. Last night I came home to no laundry detergent. However, we had fabric softener. Fabric softener and dish soap. After some discussion with my brilliant flatmate we conclude, "Why not? Its soap, right?!" So in go the dirty clothes. In goes some fabric softener. In goes some dish soap... and a little Shout Stain Spray for good measure. "They're just gym clothes," I tell myself. Whats the worst that could happen?
So I head to my room to get my notes organized for tomorrow and awhile later I hear a squeal from the kitchen. Now I'm not sure if you have seen the episode of the Brady Bunch when one of those rambunctious youngsters (Bobby? Peter perhaps?) puts something like a whole box of laundry detergent into the washer, causing an explosion of soap and foam as far as the eye can see? Yah... THAT episode. THAT episode was replaying itself in my kitchen. I'm not sure what went wrong exactly... maybe it was the extra squirt of dish soap that broke the washers back? So I mopped up the suds, stuffed some towels under the washer, and put that baby on rinse. And I continued to rinse all night long.
(I know what you're thinking, and YES, I am available for housekeeping services).

Locker Room Manners and Mannerisms

Locker room etiquette (or lack thereof) never ceases to amaze me. If Trinity's locker room was a restaurant, it would be called IHOP- the International House of (Im)Propriety. There are four kinds of women in the locker room:

The Speedsters: (like myself) women who have probably spent all of their lives showering and dressing in locker rooms. Can get get clean and presentable in fifteen minutes or less. Eyes are politely cast down until at least one layer of clothing is on. Not going to lose sleep over an exposed bum cheek. Conversation with friends, but do not speak to naked strangers.

The Prima Donnas: otherwise known as lacy bra girls. These ladies wear lacy bras and make-up to the gym, and are more interested in a chat in front of the mirror than an actual workout. When the gossip runs out, they take an inappropriate amount of space on the bench with multiple bottles of sweet-smelling concoctions and sparkles, and spend the next hour and a half primping in their locker-room-transformed-salon. Be careful, you may get sprayed with their Peaches-and-cream-and-strawberry-cotton-candy perfume.

The Prudes: more often than not North American, these woman either get un/dressed in the bathroom stall, or manipulate their clothing in such a way that they can get completely naked without anyone seeing an inch of flesh. Often do not bother showering for fear of exposed skin.

The Aspiring Nudists: these women are cross-continental and 110% happy in their birthday suits. They parade around the locker room au naturel, sit inappropriately close to strangers, and have can often be found staring at other subjects in the buff, making all those in proximity uncomfortable. (Recently when sitting on the bench and putting on my shoes, I was almost hit in the head by a Nudist's boob)! They enjoy talking to strangers while stark naked and grooming themselves.

You should have to take a locker room etiquette class before joining a gym, or maybe those with bad manners should be fined. It would probably cut down on boob attacks and unwelcome staring... and maybe I could avoid smelling like a coconut.

I Hear You Call My Name and it Feels Like Home

Had a lovely talk with Jenny last night who must be losing her mind because she referred to Naval bootcamp as "freakin amazing." I have missed her and some of my very closest friends so much lately- I relished every moment of our conversation. I miss watching Sex and the City sprawled out on her big bed and our late night talks. Dance parties and spontaneous karaoke evenings. Singing "Take Me or Leave Me" on the sidewalk in Chinatown and listening to Bon Jovi on repeat. Sitting around with Jenny and Coll while we tell stories and take turns playing each other's conscience. Its a remarkable thing to have close people in your life that "get" you, with no elaborate explanation necessary. I love love loooove my girlfriends. It will be wonderful to be on the same continent.

Its a beautiful day in Dublin! So beautiful that it was absolutely criminal to be locked away in the dark reading room, surrounded by my books, piles of notes, and multi-colored post-its. So around lunchtime I made a break for it and had a smoothie and a salad in St. Stephens Green. (I may or may not have allowed time for a little sunbathing... a girls gotta get her vitamin D)! It was lovely... and then it was back to work.

I finally feel like I am starting to move this dissertation along. Really when I can keep the momentum going its brilliant because I am so passionate about what I'm writing- the words just flow freely. Its when I get distracted by the usual suspects (i.e. sunshine, NY Times, YouTube, and blogs) that I run into trouble... I am determined to have a fabulously productive week! We'll see where I stand by Friday.

Peace on earth and good marks on dissertations! X

Good Morning

"Do you have the time?"

"Sorry?"

"DO. YOU. HAVE. THE. FUCKING. TIME. Fucking Yank."

"Ah, yes. Time to go fuck yourself, asshole."




I loooove days that start like this.

Peeves (Part Une)

Girls who wear lacy bras to the gym, bad breath, burnt coffee, bad manners, lying liars, fair-weather friends, Republicans, people who wear clothes that are two sizes too small, icy roads, conservatives, heart-breakers, narrow-minded folk, anti-feminists, bland food, feeling lost, missing, La Salle's Athletic Department, loans, sunburn, insomnia, stinky cologne, computer problems, surcharges, dill, tunafish, pressure, tourists when I'm in a hurry, sticky fingers, flying, fur, Goldschlager, my widow's peak, meanies, those who don't "lie" but mislead, humidity, doubt, biting my fingernails too short, the religious right, mathematics, European sizes, sweetcorn on pizza, Bill O'Reilly, gum that loses its flavor too fast, those who are eligible but don't vote, players, tunnel vision, doodles on my planner, pessimists, disappointment, fear, plucking, waxing, Bush, wasted afternoons, panic, boredom, clutter, creepy people in the library who stare, hopelessness, cloudy days, department store lighting, scrabble, receipts, stressing over money, the reading room when its crowded, roller coasters, know-it-alls, writers block.

"It's nice to have someone around to tell you you're quite right when you know in your heart you're quite wrong."

Yesterday was a lovely day! Had many hilarious email correspondences with my online lover MM, reconnected with a friend who is going to be of invaluable help to my dissertation, and had a wonderful night at the theatre with my friends and my new, very favorite dress!
"The Constant Wife" was fantastic! The story investigates the masquerade of a "perfect marriage," what it means to be an independent woman, and what it means to be in love. "How does one know when one is in love?"..."Could you use his toothbrush?" The actors were phenomenal. We all really enjoyed it. I need to make an effort to get to the theatre more often.
Last night Ann and I had hot chocolate and a nice long chat about the peculiarity of Irish guys. I have beautiful, funny, intelligent friends and they are continually dicked over by Irish guys. I don't mean to be a hater, but these guys (correction: some of these guys) are lower than assholes- they are complete cowards. They don't even entertain the obligatory post-date phone call known in the States as manners- they instead opt for a disappearing act of sorts, resulting in broken promises and broken hearts. Its complete bullshit. I have never seen behavior like this in my life. I swear I'll castrate the next Neanderthal that does this to my friends.
Okay sorry- rant over.
In other news, marathon training and dissertation research continues! I'm not anticipating a very exciting weekend. Mostly work and running- maybe a night at the cinema. I'm looking forward to a few low key nights- I still haven't fully recovered from Oxegen! (Siiiigh) I'm getting old...

"She's a real phony. You know why? Because she honestly believes all this phony junk that she believes."

So I managed to pull myself out of Moody Marvin mode yesterday (read: after many grumpified conversations Jared talked me off the ledge) and had quite a productive afternoon. Finished two books that I was hoping to get through and improvised a delish eggplant parm for dinner. I continued studying for a few hours and then watched "Breakfast at Tiffany's" with Ann, which makes any day better. I found myself longing for Manhattan afterwards- 5th avenue, precisely, because "nothing very bad could ever happen at Tiffany's." Audrey Hep is perfection. I was all too pleased to realize that me and Holly Golightly have similar tastes in sunglasses.


I got up early today for lifting and a run. I've been in the reading room since about 10am and plan to remain here for the day. I'm getting some tricky reading over with in hopes of being able to start writing chapter one by this weekend. Tonight some of the girls and I are headed for the Gate Theatre to see "The Constant Wife" by W. Somerset Maugham, which has had excellent reviews. I'm planning on wearing my new dress as well, so lots to look forward to this evening. New clothes and the theatre- doesn't get much better than that!

Dazed, Confused, and Not Happy

I woke up this morning at 10:37 and gave myself a bloody heart attack. GASP! I over-slept!!! I set my alarm for 6am so I could get an early start with the gym and my work and laundry and groceries and all those little things that have to be done so I can, you know, eat and not go naked. Starting my day four hours later really threw me off. Result? Panic.
I've been a wreck today for no particular reason except that writing 100 pages suddenly seems... like a lot, and trying to get it done early seems... impossible. Ofcourse this isn't entirely true, but its sure what I feel like today. Overwhelmed. Rape as a weapon of war? What the hell was I thinking? Someone shoot me.
So I did some reading this morning, threw in a load of wash, and ran to the store to complete the above mentioned errands (in the rain, thank you Ireland) and came back to my flat. Here I sit, completely disheveled, hoping that I good vent will set me back on track. The plan is to work work work the rest of the day. I have been feeling so good about this dissertation, so on top of things, ahead of the game even... there is no reason why I should feel so rotten today. Except I do. I'm not sure even my compulsive outlining will cheer me up today. Ugh.
Booo for rain and booo for dissertations and booo for panic. Someone get me a cosmopolitan.

Watching the People Get Lairy

My friends, the Oxegen Festival was AMAZING! I had such an incredible time, minus some unfortunate weather. We went up early Saturday morning and not long after we got there it started pouring and continued to do so for the next 24 hours. Rain gear was purchased by the armload, however it was absolutely impossible to stay dry, so we decided the best thing to do was embrace the storm and just start drinking. So drink we did. The music started around noon and continued throughout the day. I realize its incredibly uncool of me given the hundreds of bands that were there, but the highlights of the day for me were the headliners- The Strokes, The Who, and James Brown. I fought my way up to the pit and was in the front for all of them. The Strokes were even better than when I saw them in Dublin a few months ago. The Who were fantastic- my Dad would've gone nuts. James Brown was... bizarre. He didn't sing any of his songs to completion- it was more of a medley of his greatest hits, thrown in with a few slutty dancers, and a couple of back-up singers that resembled Dolly Parton. But still, the man is a legend, so it was sweet. Not many people can pull off a pink suit with sequins AND fringe...

Sunday was the BEST. Damian Marley, Manu Chao, Placebo, and Franz Ferdinand were fabulous, but The Kaiser Chiefs and The Red Hot Chilli Peppers were freaking AWESOME!!!! Greatest thing ever? Being in the pit when The Kaiser Chiefs played "I Predict a Riot." I LOVE LOVE LOOOOVE those guys! It was INCREDIBLE!
Today I am completely wrecked with no voice (which made for an interesting dissertation seminar this morning) but it was well worth it. Fabulous time had by all!

My Teammate Kicks your Teammate's ASS

My former La Salle Track and Field teammate Jenna Darcy has qualified for the Olympic Trials-- yes, I said Olympics-- in the marathon. Look for the shout out HERE.

The girl is a STUD. Maybe now La Salle will give the track team some freakin funding...

...yah, probably not.

CONGRATS TO JENNA! :)

Helloooo Lover

I fell in love this morning at Zara, one of my favorite retail therapy destinations. The object of my affection was a beauteous dress similar to the one pictured above, only with a different green/brown/blue 1950's print. It was divine and it was on sale, so I took that baby home with me. I am a very happy girl.

Had to run a bunch of errands this morning which kept me out of the library, but since this week has been fairly productive I wasn't propelled into a panic attack. When I got back I cleaned the flat from top to bottom, caught up on some hard news, and got settled in with my work. I'll be reading and outlining the rest of the night to prepare for a thesis presentation on Monday. My advisor has pretty high expectations so its a bit nerve-racking, but on the whole I think I'm prepared.

This weekend is the OXEGEN FESTIVAL! I am so incredibly pumped! The Who, The Kaiser Chiefs, Red Hot Chilli Peppers, The Strokes, Manu Chao, and MORE.... its going to be AMAZING! We've got two tents between the six of us going, adult beverages and snacks are going to be purchased tomorrow, and other than that, I'm just praying to the Weather Gods for sunshine-- or at least no rain. There are a ton of bands playing that I am not that familiar with, so if any of ye faithful readers have suggestions of who to make sure I see, send them along!

In other news, marathon training is going well! I survived a ten mile run yesterday, which is the longest I have run in quite some time. Next week is a 40 mile week, so by the end I may be ready to jump ship.

Only time will tell... :)

November 19th

November 19, 2006 (that's the Sunday before Thanksgiving) I am expecting everyone who loves me, likes me, or hell even hates me, to come support my humble attempt at the Philadelphia Marathon. All 26.2 bloody miles of it. I will hopefully be making the agonizing effort with one of my best friends, who I will not pressure publicly to register (COLLEEN), however regardless of whether I'm flying solo, please please mark your calendars! There will be much celebrating to do post-race, assuming that I don't die while running it!

Sunsets

As I kid, I hated sunset. After school I would tear into the house, run upstairs and put "play clothes" on, and just as I ran out the door my mother would yell, "Be home before dark!" Sunsets meant no more running through the woods, or playing in the creek, or skateboarding with Jon and Jeff. It meant dinner and homework and horror of all horrors, bedtime. What could be worse?!

Like most land-dwelling adults, I love sunsets. Especially in Dublin, its my favorite time of day. The streets are lined with people trudging home from the office or elsewhere, exhausted from long days. The city slows down just enough to be peaceful. The sky is swirled in vibrant pastels and the stone buildings glow in the setting sun. The dirty city is for a few moments transformed into a luminous Arcadia. Its perfection.

Now if I was only awake for sunrise...

Mack the Knife

"Oh, the shark, babe, has such teeth, dear, and it shows them pearly white..."

One of my favs. :)

I had another argument with my boyfriend Insomnia last night. It was a long battle, rife with tossing and turning, a brief and restless slumber, and a 7am wake-up call. Clearly, I lost. Not only have I been suffering from sleep depravation, but we have seen a return of the Essay Hives, otherwise known as the I-am-stressing-myself-out-so-successfully-that-my-body-is-rejecting-itself. I woke up clawing at my neck like a crazed animal. I know what you're thinking, and yes, it is HOT.

Admitting defeat, I stumbled into the shower at 7:15am, eyes puffy and limbs heavy. The defeat is particularly dissapointing because this was my second week of the DETOX program and I have been unable to reap the benefits of my good behavior. Annoyed by the lethargic, unproductive mornings as a result of greasy pub grub and copius amounts of alcohol, I decided that my body needs a break. Enter organic foods, whole grains, and vegetables galore. (I'm not cutting out alcohol, because lets be serious I live in Ireland, but I am limiting the intake slightly). I think I would feel tremendously better if only I could get a little shut-eye. SIGH. If only...

I had an uber productive weekend and thus far a productive Monday. I'm in a good routine with my dissertation. Work out in the morning, read for a few hours, write a minimum of 500 words, and then relax, or read more depending on the day. Lately I've been relaxing by working on a script that I started a year ago. Its been the perfect creative outlet (systematic rape research needs an outlet) and I have made more progress with it in the last week and half than in the last year. It also means I am basically writing ten hours a day, but I figure its good practice. It feels damn good to have the artistic juices flowing.

Its my sister Bryn's 19th birthday today which is pretty incredible. Sometimes I forget that I'M older than 19. It seems like just yesterday we were piled onto our trundle bed surrounded by every stuffed animal in the house snorting (i.e. fake snoring) until my Dad yelled in, "I'm not kidding, its time for bed!" which would result in an eruption of giggles. Ah, good times. I miss my sisters.

Thats all from across the pond! Hope everyone is managing to stay cool and enjoy this summer that is freakin flying by! X